23 janeiro 2019

isto (também) é Berlim

Encontrei o que se segue na página "Free Advice Berlin" - um grupo berlinense de trocas de informações no facebook:

Gareth: Alrighty 55 year old mother dearest is coming for the weekend and I wanna scare the living shit out of her by taking her to party here after doing all the nice SFW family time restaurant and walks in the park stuff.
Best ideas on a postcard where she might actually also get in? Bonus points for gay parties.
I was thinking Ficken3000, my friendly neighbourhood cruising bar.
(Not Berghain obviously - c'mon you can be more creative than that fucks sake)

Algumas respostas:

A: There is a riot on Saturday.

 
B: Take her to the ausländerbehörde [serviço de estrangeiros]

C: KitKat Saturday night 'Craneball Bizzare' for full family fun!!

D: Come on.. I am 46 and do enjoy kit kat ...what if she won’t leave till 6 am. Gareth, can you cope with?
 
E: Come to Staub after KitKat if she wants to afterhour!
 
F:  You should also take into consideration the queues, waiting for 2h in the cold might not be the best for her. Schwuz is also in the hood. Not that Berlinish techno oriented, but bigger than Ficken3000.
 
Gareth: yeah exactly. I want to go to Klappe but they're much more serious about door policy and its too small and cramped for her i think

G:
Golden gate is always freaky as f(I've only been Sunday mornings though), and you could bring a dead person with you in there. You can also go to a club in the morning to avoid queues.
 
H: If Gareth takes his mother to Golden Gate on a Sunday, I will be there and witness this!
Ontopic: Try with Sameheads. Good music, ideal for warming up and adjacent to your place.
 
I: There is a new queer party starting at Sounds called Strap On. Might be a cute but sexy option for ma?
 
J:  Take her for a quiet evening at Tom's
 
K: Juwelias Galerie StSt on Sanderstr. 26 in Kreuzkölln. A wunderful and unique tranny-trashy-arty parallel-universe, where every person's always welcome. Every Fri & Sat eve from 20-24h. Just don't forget to put a couple of Eur into the pot. Die Lady ist sexy, aber arm! ["sexy, aber arm": expressão cunhada por Wowereit, sobre Berlim, que significa "sexy, mas pobre"]
  
 

L:
After Juwelia's you could drag your Mom to Roses on Oranienstrasse. She will be blinded at the end of the night.

M:
hi, I think it's a great idea! However, I beg you, don't go to places juts because of the people inside of the club or what they will be doing there. Remember it's their (our, yours) place for free expression, not for being exhibit like in a zoo.
Take your mom out, take her everywhere, but please don't do it to show "the weird" "the creep" (or simply and honestly put : the different from you or your parents) because here in Berlin how ever these people might look like to you or your mom, they are going to these places avoiding to be treated like such and gathering with people that don't judge them, just like any of us don't actually want to be judged anywhere.
Thanks and have fun with your mom
(otherwise, tell her to come back during CSD, 1rst of May, KDK, Nolendorfstrassenfest, or any other PUBLIC act where people deliberately are manifesting the fact that they want and are proud to be seeing, plus the vibes are simply great!! I have been doing that for 3 years now with mine when they visit and the shock is guaranteed ;) but they love it!!)

Gareth:
Nah I hate that exhibit shit too. I am taking her to party in all the places I go anyways. I was looking for recommendations for which place would be good this weekend, not likely to kick up a fuss that she's never been anywhere here and not too overboard for a more timid lady in her 50s and me, the offspring of that fling she must have had with Satan.
Anyways, you say that everyone's into free expression but, seriously, i'm half worried for her because of potential judgemental looks from people going to these places just to be seen. It happens, we've all done it and we all know it happens. Hell if I stand in line for Berghain it's like the fashion police giving me the twice over.
Just sayin'
Don't worry about it. She'ssafe with me and Berlin will survive this weekend of having an old lady around.  

N: The fact that she is older than you shouldn't be a problem in places where they have their regulars from the old 80-90s berlin (kit Kat, Berghain, Paranoid...)
Have fun!

O: 
*talks about not judging others, judges by preference*

Gareth:
who was judging by preference? if you mean me because I said bonus points for gay parties - that's because i am a gay man and due to personal reasons she has no interest to be hit on by randoms right now. less likely to happen at a gay party as i'm sure you'll understand

O:
not you. Im talking about the other guy who quickly jumped into concluding that you are taking your mom to those parties just to laugh and make fun of the people there, where in reality youre obviously looking for a fun place to enjoy your time with your mom. No worries i got what you mean.
 
M: .I really don't think you read the same as Gareth, since I don't even remotely think he thought I was judging him. A sing saying "please keep the toilets as you found them before using them" is not implying you cannot keep them clean, is actually just asking for a certain social standard behaviour... I still don't see the judgment in my comment or the aim it has...

P para M:
yes, I feel you. That's one of the reasons why Berlin clubs have tough, selective doormen: to "protect" the space inside, keep out the Lonely Planet tourists, and only admit people who will *contribute* to the party.

Q:
If it's the last Saturday of the month, take her to Gayhane, too, habibi !

R:
Please Lol. His mom ist only 55. And having a son like Gareth, I m sure she s cooler as much of the young tourists visiting the city.
 
S:
KitKat will work!

T:
Berghain would be great though. Specially on Sunday

U:
Skip the party and go to an after-party

V:
Silver future bar!

W:
What an ass ... is your mother show her some respect ...

X:
I was wondering last two weeks about the same. To go and dance with mom, preferably gay party and disco but to avoid showing her amounts of drugs that people do. Is it even possible?
What about Schwuz? I've never been there (I'm boring going to Berghain or other techno shit).

Y:
I brought mine in berghain. She probably will get everywhere you also can. I borrowed my mom some clothes ahah

Z:
Well I like my schmutziges Hobby in Friedrichshain, is not too big but the environment is great

--
 
Acabaram-se-me as letras do alfabeto. Mas na página do facebook continuam os contributos que reflectem bem a diversidade de Berlim. 

(Agora vou-me retirar, para digerir em sossego a parte dos comentários em que partem do princípio que uma mulher de 55 anos é uma velhinha.)


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